One Wish

You know, if I had one wish - besides a housekeeper - it would be for a "grocery fairy". I'd love to have a little person go to the grocery store for me. It is a chore that I dread every week. If we had the space, I would just go to Cosco once a month and be done. What is frustrating is that I can't get all the items I need at Kroger and I can't get all I need at Wal-Mart. For example, Zachary & I are fanatical about our popcorn. We love Pop Secret Homestyle. Wal-Mart doesn't carry Pop Secret. We love the Welch's fruit snacks - Kroger doesn't carry them. Kroger only carries the itty-bitty peanut butter I like (Peter Pan reduced fat) - whereas Wal-Mart has bigger sizes. Kroger has the better meat & produce section...Wal-Mart is cheaper on cleaning supplies and bath products. Now, I don't go both places every week. I try to do Kroger when I can, but sometimes I HAVE to go to Wal-Mart. I can't take all 4 kids. Oh - I could - and I have - but I can''t think and I have to have 2 baskets (one to hold Sarah & Ava & 1 for food!) When I shop, I have to have a list, and I have to be able to think. This requires more time & energy than I can handle sometimes! :-) It would just be so nice to have a little "helper" do this for me - or if I could just wiggle my nose and have my fridge & pantry full...how awesome! (Sigh) I guess we all wish we could have "little helpers" around our house. Granted, I do have 4 of my own, but they "help" in other ways. Zachary & Josh help so much with the girls, Sarah "helps" me with laundry and anything else she thinks she is big enough to do, and little Ava...well...she is actually pretty good at putting up stuff when prompted. I guess I should appreciate what I do have! For now, my kitchen is full and I actually had empty laundry baskets for a couple of hours last night. It's going to be a good week!

Another Week Over!

I guess it is an age thing, but I feel like time is just slipping out of my hands. The week starts and is over before I know it. In some ways I guess that is good, but it also means that my kids are growing up right before my eyes, and I am getting older that much faster! :-)

This week has been a whirlwind of emotions...for me at least. Mainly sadness. I look around me and I see so many people I know - some of them friends, some acquaintances - whose marriages are dissolving. It breaks my heart. I mean - dreams are shattered at no hope of restoration (at least at this time). I can't imagine the pain they are going thru. It has been a long journey to this point, and there is an even longer road ahead. Some feel free to share with friends and family  and others don't. Choosing not to share only makes you feel more isolated - I think. You need to be able to lean on your friends for support and encouragement - especially as Christians. Personally, I can understand how difficult it would be to talk to other people - no matter how close you are. Anyway - I am rambling...this is just something that has really bothered me this week. It has made me take a closer look at my own marriage.  With 4 kids, we have crazy schedules, but we do try to take the time just to "catch up" on our day.  It is an effort to stay connected with each other, and if we don't work at it, we don't.  I think that is what is happening to lots of families these days.  The husband & wife get so caught up in other things, that they slip away from each other.  One thing leads to another and next thing you know - separation.  Sometimes I wonder if people really even take marriage seriously anymore.  Some people decide they don't want to "do this" anymore and just bail out.  We have to pray - not only for ourselves, but for each other - that God will protect our marriages and use them as a testament of his love for the Church.

Like I said, I am rambling -- sorry!  My friend Jen probably thinks I read her blog and then write in mine!  We have both been dealing with similar issues this week.  I guess I need to go check on my little ones.  This much silence probably means that little hands (a.k.a. AVA) are into something they shouldn't be in - like the toilet!

The Mind of a 7 Year-Old

Don't you ever wish you could just go back in time and be a kid again?  When your biggest worry was whether you should ride your bike or roller skate?  Good times.....Today, we live in a world full of crime, poverty, catastrophe, and most of all sin.  I usually pull up FoxNews.com every day and the news is always so depressing  -- some of the stories I can't even bring myself to read (especially if they involve children).   Sometimes it would be so nice to be a kid again!  Josh just turned 7, and a couple of weeks ago, he had an assignment in school to write "Things That Make Me Happy".  Here is his list (I took the liberty to correct his spelling!): 

I like my Wii

I love my family

I like my Nintendo

I love church and God

I love air

I like to write

I like my Gamecube

I love to sleep

I like school

I like video games

I hate satan 

I got the biggest kick out of this!  This is one of those papers I dated and will tuck away forever.  If you know Josh, the abundance of video games on this list should not surprise you.  I have to say, I was impressed he threw in that he loves his family (not just "likes"!), loves church and God, and hates Satan.  I guess as parents we must be doing something right!  I really miss those days of innocence - when my parents thought nothing of letting me play outside until way past dark (in the summer!)  -- not always knowing where I was.  I cannot even fathom letting my kids out of the house and not being able to put my thumb on them at all times.  I want to protect my kids forever from the evils of the world, but I must let them go at some point.  All I can do is pray a hedge of protection over them and leave them in God's hands!   For now though,  I'll try to shield them from all the "bad things" take great joy in letting them just be kids!

Whew!

Another weekend over. I'm sure Charles is glad since I had to work Sat. & Sun.! One parent + 4 kids + busy schedules makes for one frazzled parent! I'm really praying that something will change so that I can go back to just 3 days during the week. I only have to work 1 weekend a month, so it isn't the worst thing, but when there are a thousand places to go, it makes for a hectic weekend for my wonderful husband! Not to mention the fact that he leaves the house at 4 a.m. on Saturdays and gets home around noon -- aahhhh the joys of a family business! (BTW - big congrats to Zachary & Josh for passing their test for their orange belt. I am so proud of them! Charles took pics, so I will post them when he downloads them from the camera.)

On a different note....I was finally able to read the People Magazine article on Steven Curtis Chapman and his family's recovery process following the death of their daughter Maria. I just can't imagine the pain and hurt. Not only are they dealing with the loss of their daughter, but also the fact that it was their own son who accidentally ran over her. I kept thinking of those few lines from Psalm 139 ....."you knit me together in my mother's womb"......."for I know the plans I have for you"........."all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be"... On one hand you think "how could God let this happen?" but at the same time you know He wasn't surprised by this either. He knew Maria would only have a short time here on earth - but the Chapman family did not. This is just like I wrote in this blog a couple of weeks ago. Our "curtain" is only open part of the way -- God is the only One who sees the whole picture. There are some things were just aren't meant to understand -- at least -- not at this time. Enjoy every precious moment/memory with your loved ones. You never know when it will come to an end.

CONFESSION

I have a horrible confession to make - one that might startle some of you - so sit down....take a deep breath....blow it out....now listen to what I have to tell you. I HATE to shop! Whew! I'm so glad I got that off my chest! I hope you won't think less of me for it! I guess I should clarify. I hate shopping for myself -- Charles & the kids are a totally different story! Today was a reminder of why I hate to shop. Charles & I were at Macy's. They had a great sale (or so it appeared). He got 3 shirts (2 of which we later realized were Calvin Klein) for $45. They were long sleeved, dress shirts, so that was really a great deal. Charles NEVER buys himself anything, so I really had to coax him. Geesh -0ne shirt was only $7 - you can't pass that up! I decided to look at the women's stuff. Problem #1 - a "deal" was a top for about $30. Problem #2 - there are only 4.5 billion variations to tops/shirts/blouses/dresses/jackets. Guys only have to decide b/w long or short-sleeved, material, pattern. There isn't much variation there - just find your size. As for the women? Aaaagh! I just refuse to spend that much $$ and I refuse to try on 25 items to see which one I can tolerate. I wear scrubs to work 3 days a week, and on the days I am off, I am chasing a 1 and 2 year old, so I don't sit around in designer labels all day. I'll go for comfort rather than style. Target - here I come!

Let me also add that I could spend ALLLLLLLLL day shopping for the kids - especially the girls - and I get so excited when I find a good deal! (If I had $1,000 to blow, I would spend $998 at Target and The Children's Place on kids clothes and $2 on a Diet Coke for me!) I've been to Chocolate Soup 2x this month and was ecstatic with my finds! I guess it is the thrill of the chase. Chocolate Soup is the most over-priced children's clothing store in the whole tri-state area, but sometimes you can get the most unbelievable deals. I love that I can buy for Sarah and know Ava will be able to wear it too (eventually -- she is sooooo tiny compared to my amazon child!) I would be happy wearing the smocked a-line dresses, but they look a whole lot cute on a little girl than a grown woman! I guess at that point they become "moo-moo's"! :-) Don't get me wrong, I don't spend my days off at the mall. I usually only shop for the kids at the change of seasons and maybe pick up a few things here & there. All the fall stuff is out now, but it is hard to break out the corduroy when it is still 90 degrees outside!

WHY?

It's a simple question..."why?"  Yet it speaks volumes.  Maaaaany years ago, I was loaned a book to read called "When You Ask God Why" (which was written by Dan Johnson - the dad of a friend of mine!)   It is a thin - very easy to read - book, which I highly recommend.   I really need to get my own copy!  There is an illustration in that book that I have re-played in my mind many, many times over the years.  It doesn't give an answer the question "why?", but it does provide a little insight.  Now, it has been almost 20 years since I read this book ( yeah - I was only 5 at the time -- I've always been an advanced reader...ha!), so the details may not be exact, but you can still get the gist.

Imagine that you are sitting in a movie theatre and the screen in front of you is covered by a big velvet curtain.  The lights dim and the curtain opens - but only a little bit.  You see what appears to be a mother, father and young child walking along a road.  It's snowing.  The parents stop every few feet to shake the child...slap his face a little....yet it is obvious that he is tired and wants to sleep.  "How cruel!"  you think.  "I can't believe a parent would treat their child like that - that's awful!"  You are horrified at what you are witnessing.  This makes no sense...why not let the child just sleep?  Why doesn't one of the parents carry him? 

Then -- when you don't think you can watch anymore -- the curtain opens to reveal the entire screen.  You see a car trapped in a snow bank.  It's getting dark.  It's obviously freezing.  The family is heading toward what appears to be a house in the distance.  Well now it makes sense! These people aren't out in the cold and snow by choice - they are trying to survive!  They shake their child and slap his face to keep him awake.  It would be dangerous for him to fall asleep in conditions such as this.  They aren't trying to harm him -- they are trying to protect him!

When the curtain was opened all the way, the pieces all came together.  Our perception was wrong.  That's the problem.  As Christians, we rarely get to see our "curtain" opened all the way.  We are shown only a little bit of the screen.  God is the only One who sees the whole picture.  Don't get me wrong.  There are times when our "why?" question is answered, but it might take weeks, months, or even years.  I have found that about 99% of the time, I don't get my answer and that is fine.  God knows the whole situation, and that is the most important.  Oh, I'm still going to ask why...and try to make my own assumptions....don't we all?  I just have to keep reminding myself that I can't see the whole picture - that maybe it is not meant for me to know the answer to the "why?"  It's okay for me to ask.  Don't all kids ask "why?"  (and as a mom is say YES!  I should know!)

There is no need to get into the drama leading up to these thoughts.  I've been thinking about this for a few days now, so I thought I would share what is on my heart.   Don't focus on the little bit of the screen you are able to see - your view is distorted!  Take comfort in the fact that there is ALWAYS a bigger picture and someone bigger than you is fully aware of what is going on "behind the curtain"!

Well..I'm wiped out!  Zachary & Josh are spending the night at my mom's, so that leaves my & the girls to spend the morning together (Charles has to work).  I feel "out of sorts" when I don't have all my little "chicks" under one roof at night.  It's a mom thing.  I'm so glad they all love to go -- they are NOT home- bodies by any means!  Like I said, it's just a mom thing.  What am I going to do when they leave the nest?   AAAAGH!

  

Life is never dull at the Robertson house!

This is my first blog, so I'm still a little wobbly!  I've been inspired by my friend Jennifer to start this (and she doesn't even know it!)  Like her, I love to write but never get a chance to, so this is now my new "therapy" - and I'm pretty excited about it!  To my friends, I hope you find it funny, enlightening, and at times encouraging....please feel free to share your comments!

I'm going to start by telling you about our week.  Monday, I was at work (I'm a rad tech at Methodist Minor Med at Hacks & Winchester - I take x-rays and do LOTS of other stuff).  My mom watches the girls on the days I work.  Mom called me and said that Sarah had put a raisin up her nose.  I just laughed but mom was a little panicky.  Long story short -- she brought the girls up to the clinic and after 2 nurses, 1 nurse practitioner, and 1 doctor looked at her, we all determined that there was no raisin -- at least as far as we could see!  Sarah was very clear that a raisin had been in her nose, but not a clue as to where it was now.  That was Monday.....this past weekend, Charles and his dad had to take apart one of our toilets because this same little darling had stuffed it with a bar of soap, a toilet paper roll, an ear from "Larry Boy" (a Veggie Tale character), a marble, and numerous other items.  Let me just add that this isn't the first time we have had to do this!  She is quite the little ball of fire - to put it mildly!  Needless to say, all bathroom doors must be closed at all times.  Ava is now toddling around and her radar hones in on open toilet seats.  She thinks they are finger bowls and LOVES to splash around in them.  What's this?  Toilet paper?  Why this goes in there too I do believe...let's fill it up!  (Sigh)  Ava has cat-like reflexes.  Those little hands can be in the middle of something in a nanosecond!  I can just hear what she is thinking, "Wait for it........wait for it.........NOW!"

I hate to leave out Zachary & Josh, but now that school has started, they miss all of these "little" things.  I miss having them around during the day.  Sarah & Ava are almost too much for them to handle, but they are awesome big brothers.  Even though they get frustrated with Sarah (she is ALWAYS trying to get into their stuff), they love their sisters dearly and are forever at their beck-and-call.  

So -- that is our week so far.  Hopefully you will enjoy the happenings going on in our house.  Like I said in the beginning, this is my "therapy", so I'm sure to share the not-so-glamorous side as well.  I know you find it hard to believe that we aren't perfect!  :-)  Below is actually my FIRST blog I started right after we got back from vacation.  I just never got around to setting up my page.  I still need to update photos & such - just be patient and check back frequently!