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No - I don't mean "word" as in "Yo, Yo..." I mean "word" as in I have been thinking about my "word" for 2011. If you listen to KLOVE, you know what I am talking about. You are supposed to think of a word to be your "theme" for the year. One dj has the word "clear"....another one is using "distinct". I LOVE those words! Makes me wish I could have thought of them! That's okay tho....I am deciding between 2. You are supposed to decide by the end of January, so I guess I only have a few days left - guess I need to crack down!
So anyway, today was like a breath of fresh air. The sun and warmer temps were glorious! I am however paying for it now - I can't breathe out of my nose, but it was well worth it! Ava had ballet - had lunch with a friend - I ran a couple of errands - Target being one of them. Have I mentioned how I LOVE Target? Seriously, I think they must have some sort of mind altering drug that flows from the vents. It doesn't matter how many cars are in the parking lot, as soon as you walk in, it is like you are the only person in the store. Time comes to a screeching halt...my mind suddenly becomes clear....birds sing and woodland creatures eat out of my hand. Okay - well - maybe not the last part, but it wouldn't surprise me - haha! Everything looks so different in Target. I may have seen it a million times elsewhere, but when I see it in Target, it is as if I am seeing it for the first time. What is up with that? Right now, it is my favorite place to kill time. If it had a beach, I would never leave!
My ADD must be kicking in because I can't stay on one track! I mentioned I have been reading "Choosing To SEE" by Mary Beth Chapman. Have any of you read it? It is an incredibly powerful book. I read the first chapter and was afraid to pick it back up. As a mom, it was just too close to home for me (if you don't know, in May 2008, her then 5 year-old daughter Maria was accidentally run over by her older brother and was killed.) I think it was because it sounded like Maria was a perfect combination of my two girls. She liked to "pinky-promise" like Ava, and she loved it when her whole family was together - just like Sara. After a couple of days I realized that Satan was trying to use that against me. He knew that book would be a blessing to me and would try any means possible to keep me from it. So, I picked it up again and hardly been able to put it down. The Chapman's are an amazing family. Their faith is phenomenal. God has spoken to them and through them in ways you would not believe. I have so enjoyed that book because Mary Beth has made herself so transparent. You just have to read it for yourself - I might even read it again!
Well, besides work, shuttling to play practice, laundry, grocery shopping, keeping Ava from destroying something or torturing the dog, laundry, meal planning, balancing life (unsuccessfully usually), LAUNDRY (in case I haven't mentioned it already)....that pretty much sums up my week! If you have a "word" for 2011, please feel free the mention it - I'd love to know!
I just started reading "Choosing To See" by Mary Beth Chapman. The prologue was written by Beth Moore, and in the closing paragraph were these words (bear in mind she is referring to the tragic death of Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman's 5 year-old daughter Maria in May 2008):
"An unbelieving onlooker could reason that, to have a God who cared enough to orchestrate something like the timing of that dream [a dream she had about Mary Beth and Maria, which unbeknownst to her was actually an answer to prayer for Mary Beth], we'd have a God who'd never let such a tragedy happen to start with. These are places where God exercises His sovereign right to remain a mystery. We cannot fathom the intricacies of the divine plan. But make no mistake, when we are in the driest desert, we can receive the manna to make it all the way to the other side where trees bud again and children laugh. God sometimes delivers us from evils we never see. Other times He parts raging oceans before our very eyes. Still other times He says, 'When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers they will not sweep over you....Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west' (Isa. 43:2,5)"
In light of my previous blog (in case you are reading this on facebook and have no idea what I am talking about, click here to go to my blog), I really thought this was too "golden" not to post. As usual, Beth Moore so eloquently stated the point I was trying to get across - that God can exercise "His sovereign right to remain a mystery". (Sigh) ---- life gets harder as we get older (in some aspects!) :-)
So, one day last week I was listening to KLOVE and the were doing the daily news stories. They started off talking about the tragic shooting in Arizona last weekend and the death of the nine-year old girl. (BTW - wasn't she BEAUTIFUL??) Anyway, the story immediately following was about the year anniversary of the earthquake in Haiti and how an infant who had survived 4 days in the rubble without food and water was able to meet her rescuers. The baby's mom was quoted as saying that "God must have a something very special planned" for her baby. That really kind of stung me. I mean, I know it wasn't intended to sound this way, but to hear that on the heels of the story of the tragic shooting, it was almost as if this baby was saved because he/she was more special than the nine-year old who was callously gunned down. Obviously I know that isn't true, but imagine what that would sound like to a non-believer, or even to this little girl's parents?
Yet, how many times have we used that phrase in reference to someone else who had a brush with death? I know I have used it - or thought it at least. If you really think about it though, it isn't really true. We ALL have special plans for our lives - given to us by God Himself. The God I serve is not surprised by what happens here on earth. He isn't up there scratching His head or wringing His hands wondering what He's going to do with all these rebel children! :-) That - my friends - is a huge comfort to know!
When Sarah was born, on her birth announcement, one of the verses we had printed was Psalm 139:16, "Your eyes saw me when I was formless; all my days were written in Your book and planned before a single one of them began." He knows it all....our beginning...our end...and it isn't our place to try to figure it out. I mean, you can try, but you really won't be able to. Trying to figure out the "how's" or "why's" things happen to us or in our world can consume us or even make us bitter if we let them. Our purpose is spelled out in vs. 14 of Psalm 139. "I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made." THAT is our purpose...in the midst of all the tragedy surrounding us, it is our place to praise Him. Even on the days you don't feel like, JUST DO IT! It will change your whole outlook..I promise! :-)
I mean really? We are already 6 days into 2011....and I am still recovering from that blur we called the holidays! It was fun and all, but I am more than ready to assume our normal chaos. The kids were (for the most part) ready to go back to school and Ava is bouncing off the walls to go back to her ballet classes! The break was fun - restful - yet I still did not do some most of the things I wanted. :-( I had intended on doing the Happy Birthday Jesus cake, but due to unexpected illness by three of the 6 family members (myself included) - it just did not happen. It's a great idea though, so I am hoping to do it at Easter....it just can't be a "Happy Birthday" cake. (Did you get to try it Judith??) We partied 3 nights in a row...the kids had a blast - well we all did!! It's fun to have people over to our house....stresses me out to get ready for it, but it is still fun!
Anyway, decorations are down - much to the dismay of one very upset four year old. The night Charles started taking down the trees, Sarah exclaimed "Daddy, how can you do this to us? Santa will be so disappointed!" That girl is a hoot. Her latest thing is she is telling everyone that we (as in "she and I") are going out of town and never coming back. Yeah -- like that statement didn't provoke phone calls from teachers at school. Thank goodness they are all our friends! Hearing her repeat things these days is like playing the game "Rumor". Have you ever played it? You have a room full of people and one person whispers something to another and so on and so on until the last person in the room repeats what was told to them - which is usually some whacked out statement making no sense. Well, that is every day life with Sarah....minus the room full of people. She was also telling Zachary and Josh that we actually went to visit the "Fresh Beat" house. (FYI...."Fresh Beat Band" is a show that comes on Nickelodeon that the girls love. It is about 4 teenagers that live in the house and they all play musical instruments and dance, etc. I know, I know, there is the whole 'where are the parents' thing, but that is just the way it is!) So anyway, either she is dreaming some crazy dreams or I need to get her ears checked! Until then, I'm just going to be extremely careful what I say!
So anyway, I guess I will gear up for "White Out 2011" -- the weather service says we are supposed to get 5-8 inches of snow here in Memphis - which means I need to get to the store! I got the bread but I need some milk!!! Oh - and the boys need some snow shoes!!
***DISCLAIMER*** - when I started writing this post, it was Monday, December 20th, so it really was only five more sleeps til Christmas. Due to a late night trip to retrieve my stranded hubby, the post didn't get finished to Tuesday - which is really four more sleeps....I haven't totally lost it!
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That is what I told the girls tonight.....five more sleeps until Christmas! It just can't come soon enough for them, which is not surprising ~ them and their "microwave mentality"! They are just beside themselves....and I can only play the Santa card for so long - lol! It will be over soon enough (sigh).
So anyway, we had Zachary's birthday - he turned the big "12" this year. He was also quick to remind me that in 365 days he would be a teenager. UGH! I have been around little ones for years - as soon as I could babysit - but teenagers? That is unchartered territory for me! I don't know what to do with them! I don't think Zachary will be difficult. He is an awesome kid - an incredible blessing. I just can't believe that my first little bundle of joy has grown up so fast. He "broke me in" as a mom. I was so stressed those first few months - mainly when he was sleeping. SIDS freaked me out and I would literally stand over his crib on the verge of a panic attack. Finally, one night I realized that this little blessing from God was in His hands. All of Zachary's days were known to Him before he graced my arms. I was stressing over nothing. Since then, the "worries" have changed..health...happiness...friendships...you know how it goes. As a mom you never stop worrying about your kids. Now he's talking about teenage years? You know - that is a whole year away, so for now, I think I'm just going to put a pin in it and come back to it later.....
Josh got a part in the play "How I Became A Pirate". It is a really cutre story. Practices start in January and performances are the end of February. It is a rough schedule, but one we are used to. Both boys were in a play in the spring....Zachary just last month...now Josh. He is actually in the "pirate ensemble", but he doesn't care. It is a small cast, so he was just glad to get a part! He and Zachary both have made lots of friends through New Day, so he is looking forward to getting caught up with everyone.
Now, school is out and this week will be crazy, but today was fun. Went with all the kids and Charles' mom to see "Tangled"....very cute movie! Still have some shopping (just a few little things) to do...squeeze in a couple of days at work...one (and I do mean one!) more trip to Wal-Mart...a fun night with friends...then a party for Jesus' birthday! I saw a cute Happy Birthday Jeasus cake (thanks Judith!) on a friend's blog that I am going to try. If it works, then I will post some pics. The kids will enjoy it I know.
So anyway...let the fun and festivities begin! Merry Christmas!
...to be jolly? Thankful? Generous? Reflective? Forgiving? All of the above? Yeah -- probably the latter for most of us. I hate to say it, but I don't really feel all of these things in the middle of July. I most definitely should, but I don't. Sometimes it takes a dose of reality to really shake things up and make me realize just how fortunate blessed I am. My husband is sleeping soundly right next to me...yet a young bride is mourning the loss of her husband in Afghanistan (click here to see her blog). Two other couples I know of are going through a divorce. It all seems so surreal -- so unfair. I can't imagine the pain they are going through. None of these people deserve these tragedies. Why them? Why at Christmas? It seems like there should be some sort of "protective" period during the holidays so that no one should have to experience pain or death during what is supposed to be the happiest time of the year. At least ~ I wish it could be that way. Now, for these families, the holidays will only be a reminder of the day their lives changed forever. My heart really hurts for them. Again, I am reminded that I am very blessed. I have four healthy children, a house to live in, a faithful, patient, hardworking husband, a job....the list goes on. I think my last post talked about being thankful. That's okay though...I never want to take these things for granted.
Yet, go back the start of my blog....these things are all heightened in sensitivity because it is the holiday season. Why aren't we concerned with giving in July? Why aren't we adopting "angels" or supporting toy drives in the summer? Why aren't we helping out in the homeless shelters during the other months of the year? No - I don't do it, but I'm thinking I should be doing something else at other times besides Christmas. I'm not trying to point fingers - I'm talking to myself here. Y'all are just lucky enough to be a part of the conversation..haha! I need to work on that...and get my kids involved in it to. The boys and I have already been talking about what to do for Christmas to help out other kids. I want them to think of Christmas as "what can I give?" rather than "what can I get?" And I know for kiddos -- that is a hard concept! That is why I want them to decide the "who" and "where" so that they make the final call. I don't want it to be like I bought the gift and put their name on it. You know?
Anyway...I'm just kind of rambling. It's very late early in the morning. I'm thinking that Starbucks I had earlier wasn't decaf! Please be thankful for the little things as well as the big things...pray for those who are hurting, and ask God the use you to minister to someone - rather it be in a big way or a small way. And don't forget to say, "I love you" to those who mean the most to you!
Haha...I titled that b/c it is "Thanksgiving Eve" and all of Facebook is a flutter with everyone's things they are thankful for! Yes - I am truly thankful. I am thankful for the big things as well as the small things. For a job that even though I might not always like...I am blessed to have. Thankful for 4 HEALTHY kids that are all under my roof tonight. As the years go by, there is no telling where God will lead them. Thankful for an amazing husband...guys like him are few and far between. Thankful for food in my fridge and clothes in my closet. So many people are not so lucky. Thankful I have a vehicle to take me where I need to go. Thankful for little arms that hug my neck and little voices that say, "Mom, I love you." Seriously...I don't need any more than that. Really, I don't. I listen to the news and realize (again) that these kids are merely on loan to me. God has blessed me with them and He could choose to call them home any day. For tonite, they are with me. Years from now they might be across the country or even on the other side of the world. Who knows? My quiver is very full...and for that I am very thankful!
